从未缺席的父爱
Every morning at approximately 8:48 a.m., I pass it—the brick building that I visited many times as a child and that once seemed so grand, now a miniature playhouse in my mind.
每天早晨，大约8点48分的时候，我都会路过那栋砖砌的建筑。小时候，我曾经多次造访过那里。那时，这栋楼看起来是那么威严宏大，可如今它在我心里就像一个微型的玩具小屋。
My father used to live there, along with 549 other inmates. When I’d visit, as I often did, we’d chat and laugh—through a glass wall, telephones in hand.
我父亲就曾住在那里，和其他549名囚犯生活在一起。我常常去探望他，每次去时，我们都有说有笑——只不过我和他之间隔着一堵玻璃墙，每人手里拿着电话。
For me, it was normal. It was all I knew. And I relished connecting with him. It was one of the most important relationships in my life, and still is today.
对我来说，这种交流方式很正常。因为我所知道的交流方式就是这样的。我喜欢这么和他聊天。那时候，和父亲的交流是我生命中最重要的情感寄托之一，直至今天也是如此。
Experts say the years before you turn 5 are the most important. I must be lucky then. The day he was arrested on drug-related charges, the day I smiled at the policeman in our home, the day that everything changed was six months before my sixth birthday.
专家说，每个人五岁之前的经历对其成长是最为重要的。要这么说的话，我肯定是幸运的。因为就在父亲因毒品案被捕的那一天、我冲着那个闯进我家的警察微笑的那一天、我的生活从此完全改变的那一天，我已经五岁半了。
Over the years, the weekly commutes to visit my father became rituals. Eventually, after several years, we were allowed real visits when he was moved to a lower-security facility—the kind of visits where you can hug and tickle, where a conversation’s connection doesn’t depend on the distorted and crackly voice coming through the telephone, where words can be freely exchanged without the clock ticking, reminding you that time is slipping, moving faster than it should, faster than you’d like.
那之后许多年，我每星期都会坐车去探望父亲，这已经成为一种习惯。终于，在几年后，，我们这才被允许“真正”地探望他：我们可以互相拥抱，互相胳肢；可以直接对话而不再依赖电话里那种有些失真又沙哑的声音；可以自由地交谈，没有时钟在一旁嘀嗒嘀嗒，提醒我们时间在一点点溜走，而且那时钟总是走得特别快，比你希望得快。
We’ve always shared a sense of understanding, my father and I. We can look at one another and know what the other is thinking. We get each other.
父亲和我之间一直有那么一种默契。我们看着对方，就知道彼此心里在想什么。我们心有灵犀。
You’d think his absence would have prevented him from making rules, enforcing discipline and participating in the day-to-day of my childhood, but that wasn’t so. He wrote me every week, and I often go back and read what’s left of the folded, disintegrating letters. He’d tell me stories and I’d draw him fashion designs.
也许你会觉得，既然父亲没在家，他肯定没办法给我立规矩或是管教我，在我的童年生活里，他肯定也没办法天天陪着我，但实际情况却并非如此。他每个星期都会给我写信，那些留着的信现在已经折痕累累、支离破碎，但我还时常回过头去读一读。他会在信里给我讲故事，而我会给他画服装设计的图样。
1In person, we’d talk, not just speak. His life lessons, never cliché but always earnest, struck a chord with me and I soaked up every word. He told me that not having a father had been a detriment to his ego and that he’d overcompensated by feeling infallible well into his 30s. He spoke of the shame he’d caused his family and how there were times when he almost cracked, being isolated from his family, from love, from who he used to be.
见面的时候，我们会倾心交谈，而不仅仅是闲聊瞎扯。他会和我分享他的人生经验，句句真挚中肯，从不老生常谈，他说的每一个字都让我深感共鸣，我把这些话牢记心间。他告诉我，他从小没有父亲，这让他的自尊深受伤害，而三十多岁时，他又走到另一个极端，过于自信，觉得自己永远是正确的。他还谈到自己的所作所为让家人蒙受的耻辱，他说自己好几次都几近崩溃——因为远离家人，远离关爱，无法做回曾经的自己。
Other children looked forward to Saturdays, long stretches of time when their fathers would take them to swimming or hockey lessons, to the park for a walk or for an ice-cream cone. I could barely sleep with anticipation, getting up as early as 5 a.m. to hop in the car for the two-hour drive ahead.
别的孩子们都盼着过周六，期待在那长长的闲暇时间里，他们的父亲会带他们去学游泳或上曲棍球课，去公园里散步或买冰淇淋甜筒。而我每周五晚会因满心期待而难以入睡，周六早上我会五点起床，跳上汽车，然后坐两个小时的车去探望父亲。
The ice cream I was missing paled in comparison with the sweet joy of simply “being” with my dad. To have our chats, to share outdoor barbecues with my father and other families who would gather. Most children have school friends and neighbourhood friends. I had those too, but I also had my jail friends, the girls and boys with whom I would run around and play tag, not truly comprehending why these individuals probably understood me and my life far better than anyone else.
不过，只要能和父亲“待”在一起，我就感到甜蜜而快乐，相比之下，没吃上冰淇淋就显得微不足道了。我可以和父亲聊天，和父亲以及其他周末在这个地方相聚的家庭一起在户外烧烤。大多数孩子的朋友是学校的同学或是附近的邻居。我也有这样的朋友，。这些伙伴中有男孩也有女孩，我们一起东奔西跑，一起玩捉人游戏，那时我并没有真正理解，为什么这些孩子可能会比其他人更能理解我和我的生活。
My mother, who had long since separated from my father, would often ask me about my feelings, trying to uncover some inadequacy I felt, pressing for details and expressions that might make sense. How could I be okay?
很久以前，母亲就和父亲离婚了。她总是问我对父亲入狱这件事有什么感受，尽力寻找每一个可能有意义的细节和表情，试图证明我是感觉受伤害了的。她想不明白我怎么可能一点儿事儿都没有呢？
But how could I not? As a child, the word jail means nothing, and this proved itself when my stepmother broke the news to me a few months after my father’s arrest. She took me for an ice cream, and as we sat in her car in the parking lot, she explained why the police had been at our home, what it all meant, how my father would not be returning any time soon.
可我为什么就不能感觉良好呢？对于一个孩子来说，。这一点，从父亲被捕几个月后继母告诉我这个消息时我的反应上就能看出来。她带我去买了一个冰淇淋，然后，在停车场里，我们坐在她的车上时，她向我解释了警察为什么会来我家，这一切都意味着什么，以及父亲为何在短时间内不能回家了。
Yes, I cried, but only because I thought I was supposed to. I couldn’t comprehend the magnitude. I just did what all kids learn to do around this age, intuitively gauge what an adult wants from you and serve it up, all the while holding one’s breath while waiting for approval.
没错，我哭了，但那只是因为我觉得我应该哭。我那时无法理解这件事情的严重性。我只是做了所有大概这个年龄的孩子都会做的事：凭直觉估计一下大人希望你怎么做，然后把它做出来，同时屏住呼吸，等着大人的认可。
I was 11 when my father finally came home. I learned all about responsibility when he signed me up for a part-time job serving ice cream at the beach. I acted excited, though like most 11-year-olds, all I wanted to do was park myself in front of the television all summer long. But I wanted to please him, wanted to earn those extra smiles, all the ones I’d missed.
我11岁那年，父亲终于刑满回家了。他给我报名，让我去应聘了一份在沙滩上卖冰淇淋的兼职工作，这份工作让我彻底了解了什么是责任。我当时假装很激动，但其实像大多数11岁的孩子一样，我只想整个夏天都坐在电视机前度过。但是我想让他高兴，想多看到他笑，想把我错过的那些笑容都补回来。
Years later, as I stare out the window while I pass that brick building on my daily commute to work, I often wonder if I lost something, if those special years that others had with their fathers, the ones I didn’t, harmed me in some way. Am I really that different? Do I have attachment issues?
多年以后，当我每天乘车上班途经那栋砖砌的建筑时，都会从车窗向外凝望，此时我经常问自己，我是否错失过什么？在那特别的几年里，别的孩子可以和他们的父亲一起度过，但我却没有父亲陪伴，这是否对我造成了这样或那样的伤害呢？我真的那么与众不同吗？我在情感方面有没有什么问题？
I still live at home, but so does every other twentysomething I know. They still enjoy home-cooked meals, pristinely arranged households and all bills paid for by their parents.
我现在还和父母住在一起，但我认识的其他二十多岁的年轻人也都和父母一起住。他们还是很喜欢吃家里做的饭菜，喜欢家里一切都收拾得整齐干净，更喜欢父母帮他们付清所有的账单。
When I think about moving out, I know it’s not time yet. It’s not the conveniences that come from living a life almost free of responsibility, although that’s a bonus.
我也考虑过搬出去住，但我知道还不是时候。不过，这并不是因为这种几乎不需要负任何责任的生活给我带来了很多便利，虽然这种便利是额外的奖励。
I’m not ready to give up the small inner burst of joy I get every morning when my dad pops his head into my bedroom and says, “Morning, Mini,” a nickname I’ve kept far too many years. I growl and tell him to “get out!” since it’s hours before I need to get up. But I can’t help smiling.
我不愿意搬出去住，是因为我还没有准备好放弃每天早上父亲突然探头到我的卧室，冲我喊“早安，米妮(一个我叫了好多年的小名)！”时，我心里迸发出来的那点小小的快乐。我会很生气地朝他大吼“出去！”，因为离我该起床的时间还有好几个小时呢。但每当此时，我都会忍不住地微笑起来。
A Parable of a Child
一个孩子的寓言
by Steve Goodier 李 瑾 译
父母说：“我有一个孩子，他/她将来会成为一名……”
孩子说：“我是你们的孩子，我将来会成为一名……”
省略号的内容由你决定！教育与经验之间是有区别的。教育就是从阅读文字所得到的，而经验是从不阅读而得到的。看一个故事，你就会明白“伟大的学习来自于教育和经验的结合”。
一名青年教师梦见天使出现在他面前，对他说：“你将会有一个孩子，他/她将来会成为一名世界领袖。你得让她意识到自己的智慧，增长自信心，开发她果断不失细腻，虚心而又坚韧的性格特质，你会如何为她做准备呢？”
梦醒时，青年教师一身冷汗。他从没经历过这种事情。照梦中所说的，他现在或将来的学生之中的任何一个人都有可能有成为他梦中听到的那个人物。他准备好了要去帮助他们实现每一个志向吗？他默默想：“既然知道了某一个学生会成为那个人物，那么我的教学方式该怎么改变一下呢？”一步一步地，他已经开始暗自筹划了。
这名学生不仅需要有经历，而且需要有人指导。他的教学方式改变了。对他而言，每一个走过他教室的年轻人都有可能成为未来的世界领袖。他看这些学生时，不是看他们曾经是什么样子，而是看他们将来可能成为什么样子。他以一种平和的心态期盼学生发挥最大的潜力。他在教育学生时，仿佛世界的未来完全掌握在他的教导中。
多年以后，他所认识的一名女子成为举世瞩目的人物。这时他才悟出，她就是那晚梦中天使所说的那个女孩。只是，她不是他的学生，而是他的女儿。在女儿一生所遇到的老师之中，他是最棒的。
我听过这样一句话：“孩子是我们给自己无法预见的某个时间、某个地点所发送出去的活信息。”可这并不仅仅是一则有关一个无名教师的寓言，而是有关你我的寓言——不论我们是为人父母，还是为人师表。而这个故事——我们的故事，其实是这样开始的：
“你将有一个孩子，他/她将来会成为一名……”你来填完这个句子吧，如果不填“世界领袖”，那么“绝世好爸”也行；再要不“优秀教师”？“妙手神医”？“不按常理出牌的问题克星”？“鼓舞人心的艺术家”？或是“慷慨无私的慈善家”？
你会在何地、如何遇见这个孩子，那是一个谜。可是，你要相信，一个孩子的将来很有可能就取决于你给他/她所造成的影响；也要相信，孩子会出人头地的。对你来说，任何孩子都是不平凡的，你也因此脱胎换骨。
A young school teacher had a dream that an angel appeared to him and said, “You will be given a child who will grow up to become a world leader. How will you prepare her so that she will realize her intelligence, grow in confidence, develop both her assertiveness and sensitivity, be open-minded, yet strong in character？”
The young teacher awoke in a cold sweat. It had never occurred to him before——any ONE of his present or future students could be the person described in his dream. Was he preparing them to rise to ANY POSITION to which they may aspire？ He thought, “How might my teaching change if I KNEW that one of my students were this person？” He gradually began to formulate a plan in his mind.
This student would need experience as well as instruction. His teaching changed. Every young person who walked through his classroom became, for him, a future world leader. He saw each one, not as they were, but as they could be. He expected the best from his students, yet tempered it with compassion. He taught each one as if the future of the world depended on his instruction.
After many years, a woman he knew rose to a position of world prominence. He realized that she must surely have been the girl described in his dream. Only she was not one of his students, but rather his daughter. For of all the various teachers in her life, her father was the best.
I’ve heard it said that “Children are living messages we send to a time and place we will never see.” But this isn’t simply a parable about an unnamed school teacher. It is a parable about you and me——whether or not we are parents or even teachers. And the story, OUR story, actually begins like this:
“You will be given a child who will grow up to become…” You finish the sentence. If not a world leader, then a superb father？ An excellent teacher？ A gifted healer？ An innovative problem solver？ An inspiring artist？ A generous philanthropist？
Where and how you will encounter this child is a mystery. But believe that one child’s future may depend upon influence only you can provide, and something remarkable will happen. For no young person will ever be ordinary to you again. And you will never be the same.
父亲节的由来（一）
Father’s Day, contrary to popular misconception, was not established as a holiday in order to help greeting card manufacturers sell more cards. In fact when a “father’s day” was first proposed there were no Father’s Day cards!
父亲节与普遍的误解不同的是，它并非是一个为了帮助贺卡制作厂商销售更多贺卡的节日。事实上，当“父亲节”的提议首先被提出时，父亲节贺卡根本就不存在。
Mrs. John B Dodd, of Washington, first proposed the idea of a “father’s day” in 1909. Mrs. Dodd wanted a special day to honor her father William, whose wife died while giving birth to their sixth child. Mr. Smart was left to raise the newborn and his other five children by himself on a rural farm in eastern Washington state. It was after Mrs. Dodd became an adult that she realized the strength and selflessness her father had shown in raising his children as a single parent.
华盛顿州的约翰·布鲁斯·多德夫人在1909年首先提出了设立“父亲节”的提议。多德夫人希望有一个特殊的日子来向她的父亲———威廉·斯玛特表示敬意。他的妻子在生他们第六个孩子时因难产而死。斯玛特先生在华盛顿州东部乡下的农场里独自养大了六个孩子。多德太太成人后她才意识到她的父亲一个人养大孩子所表现的力量和无私。
The first Father’s Day was observed on June 19,1910 in Washington. And it was in 1966 that President Lyndon Johnson officially declared the 3rd Sunday of June as Father’s Day.
1910年的6月19日人们在华盛顿庆祝了第一个父亲节。林登·约翰逊总统最终于1966年宣布每年六月的第3个星期天为父亲节。
Father’s Day has become a day to not only honor your father, but all men who act as a father figure. Stepfathers, uncles, grandfathers, and adult male friends are all honored on Father’s Day.
父亲节现在已经成为向父亲及所有扮演父亲角色的人表达敬意的节日。继父，伯父，祖父所有成年男性都将在父亲节受到尊敬。
The rabbits who cause all the trouble 肇事的兔子
Within the memory of the youngest child there was a family of rabbits who lived behind a pack of wolves. The wolves announced that they did not like the way the rabbits were living.The wolves were crazy about the way they themselves were 1iving,because it was the only way to live.
在最小的孩子还记得的那个时候,在狼群的附近居住着兔子一家。狼们公开宣布,他们不喜欢兔子的生活方式。狼对自己的生活方式推崇备至,因为这是唯一可行的生活方式。
One night several wolves were killed in an earthquake and this was blamed on the rabbits, for it is well known that rabbits pound on the ground with their hind legs and cause earthquakes. On another night one of the wolves was killed by a bolt of lightning and this was also named on the rabbits, for it is well known that lettuce-eaters cause 1ightning.The wolves threatened to civilize the rabbits if they didnt behave.
一天晚上,几只狼在地震中死亡。这件事是兔子的责任,因为众所周知,兔子用两条腿蹬地造成了地震。另一个晚上,一只狼被雷电劈毙,这件事也怪罪于兔子,因为众所周知,雷电是由吃莴苣的动物引发的。狼威胁说,如果兔子继续为非作歹,它们将施以管教。
The rabbits decided to move away to a desert island. But the animals, who lived at a great distance, shamed them, saying, "You must stay where you are and be brave. There is no world for escapists. If the wolves attack you, we will come to your aid all probability." So the rabbits continued to live near the wolves.
兔子决定逃到一个荒岛上去。但是其它住在远处的动物奚落它们说:"你们必须守住阵脚,要勇敢。这个世界决没有逃避主义者的容身之地。如果狼攻击你们,我们多半会来相助。"于是兔子继续在狼群附近生活。
One day them was a terrible flood which drowned a great many wolves. This was blamed on the rabbits, for it is well known that carrot-nibblers with long ear cause floods. The wolves descended on the rabbits, for their own good, and imprisoned them in a dark cave, for their own protection.
有一天,发生了一场可怕的洪水,许多狼被淹死。责任怪罪到兔子头上,因为众所周知,长耳朵并小口小口吃胡萝卜的动物会引起洪水。为了兔子着想,狼对它们下手了,把它们关在黑洞里进行保护。
When nothing was heard about the rabbits for some weeks, the other animals demands to know what had happened to them. The wolves replied that the rabbits had been eaten and since they had been eaten the affair was a purely internal matter. But the other animals warned that they might possibly unite against the wolves unless some reason was given for the destruction of the rabbits. So the wolves gave them one. “They were trying to escape,” sad the wolves, "and, as you know, there is no world for escapists."
由于连续几星期没有听到兔子的消息,其它动物要求知道它们的行踪。狼回答说兔子已经被吃了;既然已经吃到肚里,此事就纯属内政。但其它动物警告说,除非有消灭兔子的正当理由,不然它们可能团结起来,一致对狼。于是,狼给了它们一条理由。"它们企图逃走",狼说。"你们也知道,这个世界决没有逃避主义者的容身之地。”
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